For months, I felt trapped in a recurring nightmare.
I went through seven job interviews across three different school districts, and every one followed the same script. I would put on the suit, sit in a quiet room, and answer some variation of the same five rehearsed questions. The interviewers would nod, offer practiced enthusiasm, promise to be in touch… and then disappear.
The worst part wasn’t the interviews. It was what came after.
Every interview started another two-week stretch of waiting. I would sit around hoping the phone would ring, replaying the conversation in my head and searching for the answer I must have gotten wrong. Maybe I should have phrased something differently. Maybe I hadn’t sounded enthusiastic enough. Maybe one mistake had cost me the job.
Then another interview would come along, and the cycle would start again.
Interview. Hope. Wait. Silence.
It was one of the lowest periods of my life because I had accepted a role I didn’t even realize I was playing: I was waiting to be picked.
I was playing their game by their rules because I assumed it was the only game available. They decided whether I was qualified, whether I moved forward, whether the phone rang.
As long as I accepted that arrangement, all I could do was perform well and wait for permission.
Everything changed when I realized I didn’t have to remain a passive participant in someone else’s decision-making process.
I could stop waiting for the phone to ring and start making calls myself. I could create opportunities instead of merely applying for them. I could choose where to go next instead of waiting for somebody else to open the door.
You don’t always have to wait to be chosen. Sometimes the most important decision is realizing that nobody needs to give you permission to move.
RW
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